You make me feel

How many times have you heard people say, "You make me feel so ___?" The feeling may be angry, ignored, useless, and so forth. The reality is that it is not the other person who is the cause of these feelings. It is your response to what the other person is doing. Their actions are triggering an emotion that you are experiencing. As a result of internalizing what the other person is doing, you are in touch with an emotion that comes with its own history. You are turning control of what you feel over to another human being. It is time to take responsibility for what you feel. This is done by changing your language to " I feel ____." Then you can express what you need if that is something that can be done safely. For example instead of saying, "You make me angry," you might say, "I am feeling angry. I need to take a break and then come back and talk to you about this." It can make a difference in how you live your life. When was the last time you declared, "You make me feel?"